Superstitious Pickup Lines Haikus


Girl, you look like spilled
salt cause I wanna throw you
over my shoulder.


Girl, you won’t think it’s
bad luck after I give you
thirteen in one night.


Girl, I want your
Evil Eye up on me… so long
as it’s vertical.


What’s the difference
between ladders and your legs? I’ll
go underneath yours.


Your black “cat” can cross
my “path” anytime… and by
path, I mean my dick.

Six Different Ways To Step On Tokyo

My latest blog for FilmBar, inspired by the release of “Shin Godzilla”. In this post I wonder what would happen if directors like Woody Allen, Michael Bay, Jim Jarmusch, Jodorowsky, Charlie Kaufman, or Wes Anderson got the opportunity to make their own Godzilla movie.

FilmBar: Six Different Ways To Step On Tokyo: New Takes On Godzilla